While women remain enigmatic to men, it seems that we also struggle to understand them. The modern woman has all but lost the ability to read men, or even tune into their needs. After all, they are vastly different from our own female desires. So what makes a man happy in the end?
Why on earth am I writing about men’s happiness?
Society as it stands seems keen on portraying only half of humanity’s needs as proper and valid. We tend to lean toward the emotional female realm, and thus leave the males of our species demonized and overlooked. Especially when it comes to their more physical, tangible wants. To me, both my and my husband’s needs are equally important. Nothing good will come out of it if we keep neglecting the other side of the human coin. As it stands, humanity is already tipping too far to one on the issue.
I watched a panel from the Daily Wire, where they talked about the things that make marriages successful. Many of the points they talked about ring true, but one seemed to have more weight loaded onto it. Men and women are inherently different, and we need to recognize and understand this fact.
Relationships might be more chaotic and prone to breaking due to the notion that we must all be the same. Men have to be more like women, and women more like men. Isn’t that crazy? The two can never be the same, and that is only a good thing for the world. From the physical and mental wirings arise the differences that we can observe within humanity. But only if we are willing to stop vilifying the most basic needs and traits nature has to offer.
#1 Show him respect
The first thing I learned when I dove into the wonderful world of wifery was that men thrive on respect. For us women, respect is nice, but it’s nowhere near the level of need that it is for our counterparts. No matter what we may be trying to convince ourselves otherwise. Respect can elevate a man to new heights, and the lack thereof can crumble their morality like no other thing.
Today, progressives label everything related to a male’s strength and passion as toxic masculinity. They are chewing out men for things that don’t even make sense, such as their tendency to be more visual. It’s no wonder that we can see the rise of movements for men’s rights and more. As a woman, I feel terrible for their tragic fates and lives.
The War on Masculinity
The holy war on masculinity has got to the level of insanity. I often like to relate it to a show we watched called Beastars. In the show, bears were made to take something that made them less, well, bear-like. Domesticated and pretty much castrated since they weren’t allowed to roam the planet as themselves. The society feared they will succumb to their carnivore nature.
But how can we respect our men more? Well, a good place to start is to stop the never-ending nagging. Which, I must admit, I still struggle with on occasion. Other things I suggest are listening and showing interest in him and his journey. Let him know it whenever you can with compliments, physical adoration, and acts of love. Especially when the man is passionate and proud of his achievement. Isn’t that just common sense in the end for us all?
Another huge thing we women seem to struggle with is letting him take the lead. I dare you to try it for a month. Stop arguing about every turn and twist he wants to make for the sake of being the one in control. Have faith in his ability to steer the boat. Your united adventures might yet surprise you.
#1 Keep him cozy
Becoming the best support I can be for my husband is now the path I travel down. I’m in charge of making sure that our nest stays cozy and harmonious. Even if I’m sometimes lacking in the whole harmony part of it. While peace and quiet don’t always come easy for my chaotic mind, I’m giving it my best shot every day. I’m still but a fledgling!
The importance of a sanctuary can’t be overstated. Who among us wants to go to work and deal with the outside lunacy and abuse, only to come home to a spouse with a face like a horse’s ass. As housewives, we have the power to make his life heaven or hell on a whole other level! And trust me, you don’t want to be making it hell in our current dating climate. Ladies, don’t become like Peggy Bundy!
Instead, we can make sure that the house is orderly and clean – cluttered living quarters clutter the mind as well. We can show our appreciation for his hard work by treating him to the foods he likes. And heck, if you’re up for it, give him a massage! We all deserve a bit of spoiling every now and again, and our husbands are not an exception to that.
#3 Satisfy his hunger
There are two kinds of hunger. I’m talking about the one that people seem to be casually willing to paint in the colors of oppression. The one they loathe the second it comes to a man experiencing it. Of course, I’m talking about the desire for another person.
Women don’t generally care much about getting or not getting a daily dose of the endorphins that come with sex. Meanwhile, men, being the driving force in the human race’s sexual side, become burdened by the lack of it.
I would implore women, to think back on the time we first started to lure in our partner. To the times when we used everything in the manual on “How to trap a man”. Too often people’s significant others start slacking in their routines which they upheld so vigilantly when they were still dating. We spend our time on trivial things rather than taking care of ourselves, our looks, and our health. The moments we took to flirt with our men, igniting their passion by showcasing how much we adore them… Well, do you really expect that same level of dedication back if you stopped giving it?
We are different
As women, we can go on for weeks with nothing but compliments, kisses, and cuddles. It’s not the same for men. Of course, once more I have to mention that I speak in an overly generalized manner. Each sex has its own oddities that break the norms. Men tend to have a bigger sex drive due to their testosterone.
So ladies, don’t be the person who loses their husband because they weren’t in the mood. You don’t leave your job, friends, or children wanting because of your fickleness. Why on earth would you do that to the person who has quite literally pledged his whole life to you?
Why do we need to care?
It should be relatively obvious, but unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like that at all. We’re living in a world where it’s ok to demonize men for their natural state and for their masculinity. In a world where the notion of chaotic living in the female ideal has somehow become the thing to do. We need to care because society is shunning half the population and the world seems to be fine with it. And no, I’m not talking about women. We are having the time of our lives despite the criers out there trying to convince us otherwise.
When it comes down to it, starving people is never going to be alright. This includes physical, emotional, and financial starvation. It’s not alright to assume what you want is what the other one needs as well. And it’s a grievous error to demand that your way is the only way. We are different, men and women, whether you like it or not. Taking away your affection and commitment to keeping the relationship alive based on your mood or some random ideology is the way to separation.
As I keep saying through my posts here on the blog, a relationship is a mutual agreement to fulfill each other’s needs. Don’t give that grace to anyone else. And don’t seek it outside your marriage. You have gained exclusivity over another person’s desires, so please, don’t abuse that power by starving them on a whim.
Aim to provide something nobody else can provide, a peaceful, beautiful sanctuary for him to rest his weary self. Keep yourself on top of the game like when you were dating. Adore and respect him as much as you used to, or better yet, more than before. You’ll reap the benefits in a beautiful way.
Last Updated: 28/06/2023